Core Beliefs: What I Learned From My Parents
Joseph McNair (1998)
| Name | Ethnicity |
| Gender: Male Female | Nationality |
| Age: 20 and under 21-3031-40 Over 40 | Occupation |
Read each pair of statements thoughtfully. Register the strength of your feeling about one statement or the other in the pair by checking:
1.( ) if you strongly agree with the first statement of the pair;
2.( ) if you agree with some reservations with the first statement of the pair;
3.( ) if you are undecided;
4.( ) if you agree with some reservations with the second statement of the pair; and
5.( ) if you strongly agree with the second statement of the pair.
Answer each numbered pair. Check only one number! If you don't know what some of the words mean, look them up. Make sure you understand what you are agree or disagreeing with. This survey is for discussion purposes only.
Several ideas/statements adapted from Six Pillars of Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden. Copyright © 1996 Joseph D. McNair.
1. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that the world was rational, predictable and intelligible.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that the world was contradictory, bewildering, unknowable.
2. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to acknowledge and respect facts.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to avoid and/or deny some facts, especially unpleasant ones.
3. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was important to think and cultivate the habit of thinking.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I shouldn't think; that they (or others) should do my thinking for me.
4. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that knowledge was valued.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that knowledge could be a dangerous thing.
5. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was not wise to appear too smart.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was important to be smarter than everyone else.
6. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was more important to conform to what other people believed than to discover what is true.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was important above all else to discover what was true.
7. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to think independently.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was more important to be obedient rather than mentally active and questioning.
8. I learned from my parents or those who raised me how to get people to do what I want them to do by giving them reasons and appealing to their understanding when possible and appropriate.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me how to get people to do what I want them to do for no other reason than because I say so!
9. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to express my views openly, without fear of punishment.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to keep my thoughts and opinions to myself.
10. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was a good thing for me to express and assert myself.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that if I express my thoughts, desires and behavior openly and spontaneously I would probably experience shame, ridicule and humiliation someone might make fun of me.
11. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was important to consider the thoughts, needs and feelings of others.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that one need only to consider one's own interests.
12. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my thoughts, needs and feelings were important.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my thoughts, needs and feelings were unimportant.
13. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that most human beings were flawed.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that there was dignity just in being a human being.
14. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was special.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that there was much that was wrong with me.
15. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to respect the likes and dislikes of others.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that the likes and dislikes of others were unimportant.
16. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my likes and dislikes are important.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my likes and dislikes were unimportant.
17. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was important to make a genuine effort to understand other people.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that one only needed to understand that other people were out to do for themselves at my expense.
18. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was important.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was of no importance to them.
19. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was interesting.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was of no particular interest to them.
20. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was loved and valued.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that they could "take me or leave me."
21. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was a source of pleasure to them.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was a source of pain and worry to them.
22. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was wanted.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was a burden to them.
23. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was important enough to try to understand.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that what was important was that I was well-behaved and brought no criticism, shame or scandal to them.
24. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I mattered.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I didn't really matter at all.
25. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that people only behaved appropriately when threatened or coerced.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that people could behave appropriately when they were given "good" reasons to do so and/or the consequences of their behavior was explained to them.
26. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I needed to be threatened or coerced to act appropriately.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was responsible for my behavior and that I could behave appropriately if I were given "good" reasons to do so and/or the consequences of my behavior was explained to me.
27. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that God was a fearsome, punishing God.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that God was a loving, forgiving God.
28. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that there was no God.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that only a power greater than myself and any human being could explain the origins of, the wonder and complexity of human beings and the world as I know it.
29. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that only God or a power greater than myself could help me correct my problematic behavior or remove my defects of character.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it is within the power of each human being to correct problematic behavior and remove defects of character if s/he choose to do so.
30. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to fear God; to serve Him (Her) to avoid His (Her) terrible wrath.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to love God; to serve Him (Her) by serving others because that was the right thing to do.
31. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was appreciated when I behaved well.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me only about those things they thought were wrong with me.
32. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was necessary to hit or strike someone to effectively discipline them.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that people could be firmly persuaded to behave without resorting to physical punishments or verbal abuse.
33. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was exceptional, competent and smart.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I was mediocre, incompetent and mentally deficient.
34. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I met their expectations of me.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I could never live up to their expectations of me.
35. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was most important to seek satisfaction out of life.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was most important to avoid pain or disapproval.
36. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to respect another's privacy.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that another's privacy is not that important.
37. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my privacy was not as important as their need to know what I was doing and thinking whenever they wanted to know.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my privacy was important and deserving of respect.
38. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was important that I think well of myself.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I should guard against valuing myself too highly; that I should strive to be humble.
39. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that great things are possible for human beings and that great things were possible for me.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that a human being's life rarely amounts to anything; that I was nothing and wouldn't amount to anything.
40. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that the world was an exciting place.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that the world was a fearful place.
41. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to consider strangers friends I haven't met.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to fear other people.
42. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to be open in the expression of my emotions and desires.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to never let anyone know what I am feeling.
43. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to have a healthy, affirmative attitude toward sex and toward my own body.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to have a negative attitude toward sex and my body.
44. I learned from my parents or those who raised me not to think or talk about sex or my body.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to have a healthy, affirmative attitude toward sex and toward my own body.
45. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was better to be a man than to be a woman.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was better to be a woman than to be a man.
46. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was good to be woman.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was unfortunate to be woman.
47. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was good to be a man.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was unfortunate to be a man.
48. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my life and achievements were mine and mine alone.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that my life achievements were not mine; that they were important only insofar as they enhanced the family reputation.
49. I learned from my parents or those who raised me to obey authority without question.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me to challenge authority.
50. I learned from my parents or those who raised me that it was all right to admit when I was wrong.
1 2 3 4 5
I learned from my parents or those who raised me that I should never admit to being wrong.